Today would have been my little brother's 41st birthday. It's been 17 months since his death. I still can't believe he is gone. I keep thinking he's just away at work or maybe on vacation. It's the only way I can cope with it by believing he's just away.
Shortly after my brother's death, never knowing how to do a web site, I attempted to create my very first one as a tribute to Earl. While creating his web site, it seemed to help me through the grieving part, however I'll never get over losing my baby brother.
Today, I promised myself that I would not cry and get all emotional, my brother wouldn't want me to. So this morning and all through the day, I'll celebrate Earl's birthday in my thoughts. I'll remember all the good times we once had as brother and sister. Every now and then I go to my brother's web site. It makes me feel like he's still alive and I can see him one more time. To go to my brother's web site, click on above the image.
2 comments:
I'm so sorry for your loss. Holidays and "special days" are always difficult, but it does get easier with the passage of time...and "getting easier" is, in itself, difficult at first because it means you're getting used to that empty space. I send you a big hug from someone who understands how much it hurts today.
I'm always late....late to work, late to appointments and meetings, late to sending Birthday cards....
I just caught your birthday message to our brother and once again the tears are flowing. There isn't one day that passes since that day that I do not think of him. I've tried all different ways to not think of him because after the good memories, the reality that I won't see him again always follows.
Someday I pray I can let go and accept what is and move on...and smile when I remember. Maybe someday that day will come. If only I knew back then just how special and just how wonderful every minute was we spent together. If only I knew, I would have held on to those moments forever.
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